God introduces life to human gradually and steadily, and in order to grasp lessons from God’s concepts, we will introduce basic concepts of prayer adopting the same way. This is a very significant lesson for us that teaches us how to deal with our children with the same love and passion filling the universe.
This introduction targets mothers to help them understand how could Qur’an pave the way for recognizing maternity concepts and goals step by step, and with most love and care.
The first pregnancy is a new experience for women. Some mothers might have a previous background on the matter, and others have absolutely no idea about it. However, there is no doubt that no woman is completely and perfectly prepared for the first baby. So, I suggest that mothers read Surat Maryam during pregnancy, as it has an influence in making women ready for welcoming maternity feelings and the experience they will go through, as well as strengthening her faith of God and His ability to create. Dates is already shown to ease labor, and the beautifully worded supplication of Yahya-peace be upon him, in the Quranic verse “So Peace on him the day he was born, the day that he dies, and the day that he will be raised up to life (again)”(15), and of Jesus-peace be upon him- in the Quranic verse: “So Peace on him the day he was born, the day that he dies, and the day that he will be raised up to life (again)”(33) relieves the mother.
Reciting the said Surah helps you to set up your goals for the coming baby: “To his son came the command): “O Yahya! take hold of the Book with might”: and We gave him Wisdom even as a youth (12) And piety (for all creatures) as from Us, and purity: He was devout (13) And kind to his parents, and he was not overbearing or rebellious (14)”
The baby does not need purification in order to feel safe, as your time, effort, and care purifies him, and by that he becomes pious and kind to his mother, and won’t become overbearing or disobedient. You should also inflict on the meaning of Quranic verses: “And He hath made me blessed wheresoever I be, and hath enjoined on me Prayer and Charity as long as I live (31) (He) hath made me kind to my mother, and not overbearing or miserable(32)”, and the verse: “But does not man call to mind that We created him before out of nothing?(67). It would also help if you read words of God the Almighty: “He said: “So (it will be) thy Lord saith, ‘that is easy for Me: I did indeed create thee before, when thou hadst been nothing!'(9)”.
You should contemplate these verses, as nothing more than my belief in these verses and how God is aware of the mother’s fear has reassured me, and God revealed these verses in order to comfort the mother.
Listening to the Qur’an also brings a feeling of calm and serenity. Studies have shown that listening to the Qur’an releases endorphins (the hormone of happiness), which stimulate the alpha waves of the mind and are responsible for measuring and removing feeling of stress, and creating a sense of comfort and tranquility. Most of these studies are based on wearing headphones and listening to Qur’an while working, exercising, or doing any other activity, or even just sitting. To find out more information on this topic, you can Google the following address:
“Quran healing listening program”
If the pregnancy is unwanted, then you can put your headphones while working at home or outside, and listen to these verses, as well as to Surat Al-Baqarah to help you adapt your mind and accept the gift that God Almighty gave you, for He knows what we do not know, and because your child will feel the same feelings of distress you have due to such unwanted pregnancy. I’ve had this experience before and it was a very difficult one, since I did not enjoy any moment of pregnancy nor did I enjoyed meeting with my child. I deviated so much from the path of my life and work, and I felt that everything would change and life would stop. Everyone, but me, was happy. How I wish someone had shared her experience with me, or advised me to sit by myself, and think about those moments, or listen to these verses from the Holy Qur’an. Given that I was overwhelmed by negativity, my child was unfortunately neither happy nor comfortable. The question that irritated me was: What am I going to teach this child? I needed first to feel comfortable with myself so that I could give him love and care.
Don’t hesitate to ask for help whenever you feel in a need to express your feelings to someone. You can participate in educational workshops. There is a caring person inside every woman, but life’s concerns make us forget who we are, what our goal is and how to achieve it.
The workshops will help you pick up a lot about what to expect and direct you toward the right path to take with your family. Only through it your road map will be drafted, and you will only need to steer the wheel and live your adventure with all its beautiful moments and memories with your loved ones. Life is not simply phases that we have to go through, but rather is the precious moments we live and the decisions we make in our journey from one phase to the next. This is where happiness and success lie.
Stimulate the mother spirit inside you and remove the dust from it, as such mother spirit inside you has a tremendous ability to give what you never imagined you had before. I never expected that one day I would be a mother in this way, that I would raise, enjoy, and accomplish in this way. Make effort to draw your map so you have a happy journey and enjoy your accomplishments, and you will be impressed by your ability and determination to succeed. All you need is the keys to success and the map that you will follow, then you will be a happy and satisfied mother. Additionally, you will learn the skills needed for returning to work after maternity leave, such as skills of commitment, ability to handle stress, analysis, problem solving and other key skills required to fulfill the working mother’s role.
Introduction to Prayer:
As God introduced us life step by step, and just as ideas were produced to us in a simple way derived from names of things so we can memorize them, and then experience different feelings, similarly, we here need to act carefully when introducing the world to our child. We must introduce him prayer in a lenient way. We must first confirm that prayer is a sport for stretching the muscles and lungs, and a source of energy, discipline and commitment. This implies that you stop doing whatever you do and go to prayer to focus your mind, soul and body, it also reminds us of the highest goal of man, which is guidance, which was mentioned in Surat Al-Fatihah. Following the straight path achieves balance, and in return, God’s promise to us that we will be among those upon whom Thou hast bestowed favors, not of those upon whom Thy wrath is brought down, nor of those who go astray, will be realized. We need to teach our child all of that, but progressively. The application of the aforementioned idea is summarized in the following stages
From birth until age of 4
We will introduce the child with the call to prayer, through applications for the call to prayer and knowing prayer times, for example. Once you hear the call to prayer, turn to the child and then tell him (call to prayer) and perform ablution, and do not force the child to listen or be silent. The aim is to draw his attention to understand that hearing this sound means that we should get up to perform ablution and pray. Then, we say (God is greatest, Hasten to the prayer), go to the bathroom and put the child in his chair in front of the bathroom, and perform ablution. After that we take him near the prayer rug. You can also place a rug in front of your child.
Do not be in a haste when starting the prayer movements. Calmly stretch your muscles and expand your lungs (by reading the Qur’an) and enjoy the refreshing of energy when prostrating. You can watch videos of prayer movements and the correct stretching of the muscles.
When the child begins to walk and move outside the chair, and begins to imitate you, he will surprise you with his commitment, as children at this age have the ability to store information and movements accurately compared to children after the age of 7
After finishing the prayer, hug your child and pray for him to have beautiful days, a happy life, good health, delicious food, a strong heart and a sound mind that loves knowledge. You can use one of the recorded meditations available on the Internet.
You can also take a nap after noon prayer to form part of the daily routine for you and your child. As for after the evening prayer, you can further repeat the supplication and embrace the child beside the bed or in the bed..
Don’t forget to keep a smile on your face, you are at your best during these moments and achieving your best achievement as a female and a mother. Whatever your job and whatever goal you’re working to accomplish, there’s spacious time to get it done, but your priority is to raise a child who is tender, intelligent, pious, and kind to his parents, not tyrannical and disobedient child. Remember that your ultimate goal is to serve society and the world. Even if you have to delay your project for a year or more, don’t worry. Set your priorities
Years between 3-4
At this age, it is possible for the child to listen to contemplations that lay the foundation for submission and focus on oneself (mind, body, and spirit), and help behave humbly and modestly before creatures, and thus before the Creator. We continue to pray and alert the child to the call to prayer, and begin ablution and prayer. Then we choose contemplations to read for the child while we hug him tenderly.
From 4 to 7 years of age
If you persist with the previous routine, you will be a proud mother when it comes to the results. I ask those who have completed the steps of introducing prayers to children from birth to the age of 4 years to share their experiences so that all mothers can benefit from this.
At this stage we will provide more details about ablution, prayer and the Qur’an.
We will explain to the child the concept of ((and we made from water every living thing)), and show him how plants and living things live on water.
We will also explain to him how ablution removes germs and viruses from our bodies, and so we must wash. Inhalation is very important for cleaning the nose, and a picture can be shown to the child for making him familiar with the location of the sinuses and the areas where dirt collects.
Saving the consumption of earth’s energies: If a child listens to meditation, the seed of love and preservation of the earth will grow in him.
And here we say to him: (Think about preserving water when consuming it, as it may disappear one day). Let him see the water tank and how it runs out of water and how it should be preserved. Use the same method of washing clothes, for example (wear a special robe for cleaning or planting so that your clothes do not get dirty, and you won’t have to waste water on washing them). I still remember that day when my son did not follow these instructions, so I cut off the water from the house for a whole day, and here he felt this blessing and began to think about saving water.
If you are out on a trip, tell your child: How do we clean ourselves? Yes, sand! We will rub our hands with sand because it works like a loofah and cleans our bodies
Learning about the Qur’an:
When you bring pieces of furniture to assemble, involve your child in the assembly process and say: Ok, I need the manual to link the pieces together. Follow the steps of the user manual and then tell him: Imagine if there was no manual, we would have wasted a lot of effort and time, and it could have been damaged. Then I show him the refrigerator manual which explains how to use it, and I repeat the sentence: Imagine if there was no manual we would have wasted a lot of effort and time and it could have been damaged. Repeat such phrase when trying to assemble any appliance or piece of furniture you purchase.
Then tell your child: (We also have a user manual so that we do not get exhausted of thinking and do not waste time or waste our lives. Shall I introduce it to you?) Then say to him: (let’s perform ablution. We must be clean before we catch it because it came down from heaven). After completing the ablution, bring the Qur’an and kneel in front of your child and say to him: This is my manual book and I am sharing it with you.
When you understand how to maintain it, you will have one of your own. Present the Qur’an to him with both hands, then read the first verses revealed to the Prophet Muhammad from Surat Al-Alaq: “Proclaim! (or read!) in the name of thy Lord and Cherisher, Who created-(1) Created man, out of a (mere) clot of congealed blood(2)” Tell your child that God created us like a furniture assembly guide and a refrigerator user manual. Ask him to close his eyes so you can read to him if he desires so. Read to your child slowly and beautifully.
The child needs to memorize some verses to perform the prayer. You can recite them after completing the prayer together, and help him memorize them. The best surahs are Al-Ikhlas, Al-Nas, and Al-Fatihah. You can play the Abrahamic prayer track that you can find in the contemplations file so that the child can hear and memorize it.
Prayer: We follow the same manner when hearing the call to prayer. We alert the child for the call to prayer, and go to perform ablution and then start the prayer aloud so that the child learns what to say in each prayer movement. After completing the prayer, we hug the child and recite verses from Surat Maryam: “To his son came the command): “O Yahya! take hold of the Book with might”: and We gave him Wisdom even as a youth(12)And piety (for all creatures) as from Us, and purity: He was devout(13) And kind to his parents, and he was not overbearing or rebellious(14)So Peace on him the day he was born, the day that he dies, and the day that he will be raised up to life (again)(15)
“He said: “I am indeed a servant of Allah: He hath given me revelation and made me a prophet(30)And He hath made me blessed wheresoever I be, and hath enjoined on me Prayer and Charity as long as I live(31)(He) hath made me kind to my mother, and not overbearing or miserable(32)
Then we ask the child: Why did God give us the book (Quran) and ordered us to read and pray? We read the book to learn the names of many things and to grow our mind. We pray and stretch our muscles, so our body grows. We read the Qur’an and our souls are purified.
There are many passages in the contemplations section that help to understand how the body, mind, and spirit grow.
Explain to the child how the muscles are stretched, and help him to apply the movements and focus on the muscles that should be stretched in each movement. For example, when we raise our hands to say Allahu Akbar, the shoulder and back muscles should work, and when we kneel, the muscles behind the thighs and lower back should function. The video explains all the movements comprehensively.
Note: If the child does not want to join you, continue performing ablution and prayer with passion, and no matter how much he tries to interrupt you, tell him: (I heard the call for prayer, and I will not stop until I pray. I apologize, I cannot join you now). Please don’t mention hell or demons, we give love and then learn how to maintain a relationship. Fear enhances aversion to prayer and makes the child stray from prayer and the love of God. This is a sin and a great mistake we may commit against our children, as it is sufficient to make the child move away from the Creator.
Note: If you are sad or angry, tell your child: “I am sad, and I need to pray or listen to the Qur’an. This helps me calm down a lot.”
I wish success to everybody. Always remember that every change starts with you, and only you. You are the one who will change the world, you have the power to decide and you are raising the future generation.